So, Lilly got a new bike today. Actually, it was her first bike. The result of her EARNING 20 stickers for "behaving" at naptime at school. It took six weeks, but she did it. She earned her bicycle, and my parents bought it for her. I didn't remember my first bike, or who taught me to ride it until my mom reminded me today while Lilly was riding around the underground garage showing off her new princess bike.
My mom taught me. She is the one who let go and let me soar. Why I don't remember this, I don't know. What I do remember is riding hands free down the road away from our house and the golf course towards the pool where my sister was a lifeguard. We lived on an Army Base and since my dad was gone saving the world and jumping out of airplaines, it was left up to my mom to soldier on while my sister lifeguarded and did her teenage thing. It was also on my mom to teach me to ride my bike. She also taught me to drive, but this is another post for another time.
I think my first bike looked something like this...
I do remember falling once and it hurting, but my mom says this didn't happen. The mind, well it goes...
When I was little, my family, no matter where we were living at the time, would visit my grandparents for Christmas. We weren't transients or anything, but my dad was in the military and we moved a lot. This is another post unto itself, or maybe even a book. :)
Anyway, we would head to my grandparents house every Christmas and I would run around like a crazy child who had been stuck in a car for endless hours. I would play with my cousins, mess around on the old organ in their TV room and spend endless hours with my grandma. If I close my eyes, I can smell her perfume and hear her unwrapping butterscotch candies. She was a funny woman who never went anywhere without lipstick. Her nightly ritual of ponds cold cream and shimmery nightgowns is a memory seared in my soul.
My grandma is the reason I only like movies and tv shows that have resolutions. I tend to take a restroom break or go get more snacks during middles. I even read books like this. When I was at my grandma's those many years ago, it never failed that on Saturday nights at 9pm, me and sometimes my cousin Danielle, would cuddle up with an afghan and watch The Love Boat with our beloved Grandma.
Every. Single. Week. the story went exactly like this: 20 minutes of fun in the sun and Gopher doing something silly. The next 20 minutes were drama; someone broke someone's heart, or was hiding something from someone else. Then the last 20 minutes was the resolution. I would get so upset during the middle 20 minutes. I knew it was going to eventually be alright, but I would still be stressed. As a little girl, I figured out that if I just skipped the middle 20 minutes, I could be happy and all would be well with the world. The big cruise ship of life was docked on land.
When I learned of Corey Haim's death this morning, I went through a quick mental montage of the movies he made. I will admit, the last movie I saw of his was License to Drive. Of course I was scared during Lost Boys and cried during Lucas. One of my favorite movies starring him was Murphy's Romance. I mean, Sally Field, James Garner and Corey Haim. It didn't get much better. There were tears, life lessons and laughs. The resolution is a happy ending.
Corey Haim did not have a resolution. His middle lasted most of his adult life and ended with his tragic death. I look at my children and know they won't ever be stars, or famous, but will that save them from hard lives because of bad choices? My own choices haven't been stellar my whole life and there are those who know me and they will attest to this. I am not ready for my final resolution, but I truly believe I am done with my middle. In small part to my Grandma, but mostly because of my mom and dad. In the words of the wisest woman I know, "The more people that love your children, the better." Such love carried me through my middle, and if my kids have a middle, such love will carry them.
